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Writing Your Wedding Vows Together

If you are going to say the same vows to one another, it will be more meaningful if you write your vows together. Try the following:

  1. First, be certain to do this when you and your fiancÚ can be alone. You won't want others to disturb you, so ensure that you can have some privacy.
  2. Each of you should grab a stack of paper and a pen or pencil.
  3. Set a time limit for how long you are going work separately. Agree to rejoin each other in a half hour or so.
  4. Go to separate rooms. Make sure you are comfortable and not worried about being disturbed.
  5. Write a letter to your fiancÚ telling them why you love them. Do not make this short and sweet. Instead, elaborate, go in-depth, and be creative.
  6. Write 2-3 of your favorite times together - the times when you laughed so hard you cried, or when s/he was there for you, or an inside joke, or something that happened long ago that you haven't thought about it in a long time.
  7. Write down the scriptures, quotes, and songs that you are using at your wedding. Reflect on these and write what they mean to you or the most important part of them.
  8. Now, get back together and either switch papers, or take turns reading your letters and stories to one another.
  9. When you are finished crying and hugging and smiling, talk about what you thought were the best parts of each of your letters and stories. Are there a few things you can pick out that you could say as vows? To help you out, most traditional vows go something like this:

    • "In the name of God, I, Name take you, Name to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death. This is my solemn vow."

    • Here is an example of how you could write your vows with a "From This Moment" theme:

    • "From this moment, I, Name, take you, Name, as my best friend for life. I pledge to honor, encourage, and support you through our walk together. When our way becomes difficult, I promise to stand by you and uplift you, so that through our union we can accomplish more than we could alone. I promise to work at our love and always make you a priority in my life. With every beat of my heart, I will love you. This is my solemn vow."

  10. Once you have written your vows, you will most likely want to talk with your Officiant about them. S/he may want to approve them and/or offer you some more suggestions.
  11. As a side note: After your wedding, if your vows were especially meaningful to you, type them up, print them on nice paper, and frame them to hang in your house. This way, you will never forget them and you will always be reminded of how special and sacred they are to your marriage.

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