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Questions for Writing Your Vows

Print out two copies of these questions. Take one and give the other to your fiancÚ and take two blank pieces of paper each also. Go to separate rooms to complete these questions. When you are finished, there are more instructions at the bottom.

WARNING! This IS going to require you to be a bit mushy and sappy. You can do it! Just mean what you say, feel it within, and it won't seem so sappy anymore. Good Luck!

  1. Write down any scriptures or other readings for your wedding (or make sure to bring them with you).

  2. Write down your favorite lines from any solos being sung at your wedding or from your First Dance song.

  3. Write down any favorite quotes you may have or sayings that have been meaningful to your relationship.

  4. On the blank piece of paper you brought with you, write a letter to your fiancÚ using the following instructions:

    • Begin with a salutation that is very heartfelt; For example, "My Dearest...", or something to that effect.
    • In the first paragraph, tell him/her how much s/he means to you and your life.
    • Begin the next paragraph with the words, "It seems like only yesterday that..." Run with it.
    • In the next paragraph tell him/her how you felt when you realized you were in love with them.
    • In this paragraph, tell him or her what marriage means to you. What aspects of being married are you looking forward to? What are some of your fears? How are you going to address these fears if and when they come about?
    • Finally, close your letter with words of love and thanksgiving for your significant other.

  5. Now, get back together with your fiancÚ and switch both this paper and the letters you have written.

  6. When you are finished reading each other's papers, go back through and underline your favorite sentences or words of your fiancÚ's answers and letter.

  7. Now, discuss.

  8. On another sheet of paper, write down your brainstorms. Start your vows with something close to the effect of "I ______, take you, ______." or, "I ______ choose you, _______". This will get the ball rolling. Continue writing, using the sentences and words you found most meaningful to you and your relationship.

  9. If you need an example of traditional vows, this might help you:
    "In the name of God, I, Name take you, Name to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death. This is my solemn vow."
  10. Now, make a copy of your vows for both of you. Stand up, hold hands, and give it a try. When you read your vows look into his or her eyes and pretend that you are actually standing at your wedding. If you find yourself coming close to tears, your attempts have been a success!

  11. Finally, I would really like to know how it went for you. Did this worksheet help you to write your vows? Do you have any advice for brides and grooms who are writing their vows? Please help me out by e-mailing me your thoughts! And, if you are willing to share your vows with other brides and grooms, e-mail those to me also! Thank you!

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